“Ever morning, until you dead in the ground, you gone have to make this decision. You gone have to ask yourself, “Am I gone believe what them fools say about me today?”
~The Help, Kathryn Stockett
Men Vs Women Fears
“Why do men feel threatened by women?” I asked a male friend of mine. So this male friend of mine, who does by the way exist, conveniently entered into the following dialogue. “I mean,” I said, “men are bigger, most of the time, they can run faster, strangle better, and they have on the average a lot more money and power.” “They’re afraid women will laugh at them,” he said. “Undercut their world view.” Then I asked some women students in a quickie poetry seminar I was giving, “Why do women feel threatened by men?” “They’re afraid of being killed,” they said.
~Atwood, Margaret, Writing the Male Character (1982)
Links List
- The Bodies of the Girls Who Made Me: Fanfic and the Modern World. I’ve written fanfic and this essay was such a revelation for me. “I honestly think the reason so many fanfic writers are women/girls [or gay, or gender-noncomforting, or some combination of the above] is a mixture of social stigma [“ew, fanfic is a GIRLY thing, ew, it’s all PORN, and most of it is GAY PORN”] and seeking a way to empathize with The Default. I also think this contributes to the prevalence of male/male couples in fanfic even when written by authors who identify as straight: by being only The Default, we move away from the “ew icky girls” reactions. But that’s another conversation.” AND “Enter The Default, that strong-jawed, clear-eyed, straight, white, cisgendered, able-bodied, vaguely Christian (but not too Christian) male.”
- Keto for Women: 7 Tips to Make it Work. I’m on keto day #9 and I’ve lost 4 pounds so far. I’ve been focusing on adding more protein and fat and less carbs. All the rest I can add in if I think it’s necessary and if I think it will help with my goals.
- None to Run. I am walker but I’d like to be a runner. Again, I think it will help with my help goals, I don’t have to join a gym (although, I may) and I can do it anywhere. I just started this on Monday. Eight 30 second runs each followed by a 2 minute recovery—not too bad. Challenging enough but not impossible for me. And it builds gradually.
- Evolve by Imagine Dragons. Music I’m listening to now. Great to walk/fun to. Good beat. A little bit different. Great lyrics.
- Brave Enough by Lindsey Stirling. More music I’m loving right now. I guess I’m enjoying something a bit different from the pop music on the radio. Bought this for the song “Something Wild” and I am enjoying the whole album.
- Mark Hamill Instagram. I may join Instagram just to follow him. He dressed as a Stormtrooper and moved through the San Diego Comic Con incognito. Love this!
Pac Man or Chess?
Because ‘having everything’ is playing life like Pac Man instead of chess.
In Pac Man you never win. It just gets faster and faster and harder and harder UNTIL YOU DIE. Chess? There is strategy, patience, willingness to ‘let go’ of even ‘important’ pieces to protect the most crucial one. In chess, you CAN actually win!
The Priority Parallax: Everything is Not as Important as It Appears
Kristen Lamb always gets me thinking.
Quick Movie Review: Avengers: Infinity War
NO SPOILERS!
Awesome. Good story line. Good juggling of all those characters without becoming overwhelming or confusing. Kept those bright pops of humor, which I needed. And, OMG, did they really do that!!!!????
Black Panther is still my favorite Marvel movie to date, however.
Make a choice. Every day.
I always have a story going on in my head. The last few months it’s been a fan-fiction crossover of Harry Potter and Battlestar Galactica. Part of me wants to write it. Magic vs tech. Very cool. And I’d get to kill the whole Cylons-get-religion plotline that my atheist heart despised.
I may write that someday, for fun and to stop it nagging at me, but for now my desire is to write an original novel. (I don’t know if that’s my greatest desire. I keep telling myself that. It is on my mind daily.)
I’m at a point in my life where I have unencumbered time to write. The kids are in college and it isn’t necessary for me to work outside the home. Last week I was completely alone while my husband traveled for business.
And I wrote NOTHING.
I binged watched Grey’s Anatomy. (I didn’t even watch BSG or HP with the excuse of research.) I felt guilty and gave myself many depressive mental tongue-lashings. But I still didn’t write.
I did work on my novel for an hour today. Because I can muster up will-power on occasion. But first I did laundry, sorted out some clothes I no longer wanted, made a lovely breakfast, re-did my wreath for Spring, ordered some photo prints, photographed the cat…
Resistance 1, Me 0. (The War of Art, Steven Pressfield)
I’m currently reading The Modern Library Writer’s Workshop : A Guide to the Craft of Fiction by Stephen Koch and two things have stuck with me so far:
- You have to sacrifice. There’s only so much time. You can’t do everything. You can’t binge watch Grey’s Anatomy and make a dent in producing a novel. You have to choose. Every day a choice. Write or ____. And most days you have to choose to write or the novel will never be finished. Or the next, slightly better novel will never get finished. And so on.
- Your first drafts are like free writing. Just keep writing. (And now Dory is singing in my head.) Get the draft done. Edit and re-write later.
What does this all mean to me? I need to write. Daily. And without interruption.
Make a choice. Every day.
Quick Movie Review: The Greatest Showman
Meh. Too big a life to pack into a movie, so it lacked depth, even with the parallel romance story line. And all the other points it tried to touch on. No depth, no tension. Awesome soundtrack. Save your money and buy the soundtrack and wait for it to hit Netflix if you really want to view it.
Sunday Movie Reviews
After two hectic weeks, I had a chance to chill on Sunday afternoon. Since I’m not allowed to watch the Pats play—as that might jinx them somehow—I cuddled up with my laptop to watch a free movie through Amazon Prime. (Just kidding about jinxing the Pats. I’m not a sports person and the husband yells at the TV sometimes and that ain’t fun.)
First movie choice: Holiday Engagement. The premise wasn’t very original but I thought a light, romantic comedy could be fun for my tired body and fried brain. Ugh. I didn’t last 20 minutes before I killed it. Story lines are used over and over again in fiction. Look at how many times Cinderella has been done, and people still enjoy the story. This was just horrible. Uninspired. Boring. Predictable. Flat, stereotypical characters. No chemistry between the romantic leads. And completely offensive to me as a woman. I paused the movie at one point to check when it had been made. 2011? Really? More like 1950’s attitudes. Oh, darling, you don’t need a job. Once we’re married, you can run charity events and save the puppies of the world. 0 out of 5 stars.
Second movie: The Big Sick. I watch most movies with the husband and that means thrillers, action-adventure, sci-fi or anything that loud and moves fast. So when I watch a movie alone, I usually choose a romance, something thoughtful, a light comedy or something offbeat. Something he wouldn’t normally watch. The Big Sick had all of these elements. A little offbeat, some comedy, some romance and it made me think. I like how grounded in everyday life it was and still managed to have emotional weight. And I appreciated the glimpse into another culture and the adaptation to American life. 4 out of 5 stars.
“The Unpersuadables: Adventures with the Enemies of Science” Quote
An expert on the psychology of evil, Professor Roy Baumeister, has written that ‘dangerous people, from playground bullies to warmongering dictators, consist mainly of those who have highly favourable views about themselves. They strike out at others who question or dispute those favourable views.’
~ “The Unpersuadables: Adventures with the Enemies of Science” by Will Storr
Something to remember as a writer when creating characters.
Quick Restaurant Review: The Duck
The Duck, Sturbridge, MA
4 out of 5 stars
The Duck’s online description had me wary: “…steaks, enjoy a fantastic seafood special, bite into a mouth-watering cheeseburger.” Oh no, not more pub food. But they are part of the group that owns Cedar Street Grille, one of my all-time favorite restaurants. Thankfully, the Duck is upscale pub food, with a twist.
The appetizer menu looked interesting but we were too afraid to fill up before the entrée to order any. Duck Confit Poutine, Candied Bacon Skewer, Basil Gorgonzola Bread… all looked scrumptious. I saw the House Mac & Cheese appetizer and it was huge!
They have a wide selection of craft brew beers available, which my hubby loves, although we chose to drink wine with our meals.
The hubby had the braise short ribs special, which was amazing. He could’ve eaten with a spoon it was so tender. He didn’t care for the cheese on top because he’s not a blue cheese person, otherwise it was a thumbs up.
I had the Grilled Veal Rib Chop off the standard menu. I hadn’t had veal in a long time and had never had this cut. The port wine mission fig demi gave a nice char to the chop with enough sauce leftover to swirl my bites in. The rib chop was a bit tougher than expected but still very tasty.
We will definitely get back to The Duck but I’m looking forward to Avellino, the Italian restaurant downstairs from The Duck for my next foray.
Rose Sparrowking 